It's October

The house is quiet. I have been staying up late, too late, to try and work on the computer after everyone else is in bed. Theo still wakes up nearly every hour - but at least I have 60 minute chunks to focus.

Starting a business is hard. Running it alone is hard. Especially when I am trying to sell more of an idea than a product. I know business will pick up but it can be very emotionally draining putting so much work into something that seems to still only take money out of our pockets, not put it in.

I try not to get discouraged when I see other shops pop up and instantly have thousands of fans and I assume customers. I remind myself that I am building something bigger, not simply a t-shirt company. I am building a brand, a mission, a way to give back to parents in a fun and fundamental way. The shirts...They are just the first brick being laid.

I spend so much time thinking about this shop that I don't make time to write down the ways my baby boy is growing and changing. Do you think that is bad? Part of me feels like I need to give him every ounce of my attention. Record the ways he is growing and changing. Film him, spend more time on family projects, find ways to make sure that in 25 years I haven't forgotten how amazing everything he does is.
























My boy. He is 14 months old. He is starting to run, arms out to his sides, elbows bent, wrists limp. He  talks constantly, like his brother and father and grandfather. He loves to eat nearly everything. We don't give him baby food - he eats what we are eating and has since he started eating solids. Tonight, he was quite happy to use his little spoon to scoop beef bolognese into his mouth.

He has his hand down my shirt whenever he feels he needs to feel comforted or safe...Anytime we are around other people. When he smiles he usually scrunches up his entire face, making my soul laugh. He likes to push me around - head between my legs, hands on my thighs. He is obsessed with playing with wrapped tampons - shoving one to two in his mouth and having two to three in each hand as back up in case I make him spit out what's in his mouth. He doesn't have a fear of heights, often yelling gibberish off our balcony, head pressed into the bars and a leg dangling through, climbing on top of the table, and up into the window sills.

My baby boy loves to hug people. He usually looks at me with a cheeky smile while he does it. He knows that I think it's adorable. He brings me his shoes when I say we are going bye bye and loves to lean against the front door with his hands behind his bottom. In the evening, while I am cleaning up after dinner he becomes very busy. He will disappear into he and Graham's room and come back wielding a wooden sword or shovel, grumbling things at me as he waves it in the air. He is curiously skilled at using a sword - for a baby.

When he is thinking of something mischievous to do he looks at me smirks, furrows his brow, and moves his eyeballs to the side. It's my favorite. And did I mention he loves to dance? I know all babies love to dance - but I have been around quite a few other babies and I can confidently say that this guy is very passionate about music and moving. He will start dropping his booty to anything that remotely resembles a tune. His newest move is a one footed stomp, but he like to bounce, shake his head back and forth, clap, and move his butt around. He also like to run in place - but that is when he is either very upset or very excited. It usually involves getting food or not getting food.

This boy is wild, happy, sweet, curious, and passionate. He stays close to me but loves to run free when he knows I am close by. How will I possibly handle him growing up? I am so in love with this little human I don't know how I will ever detach.

My amazing baby boy. I can't wait to see the beautiful man you grow to become.

I sit in the corner of my bedroom working on fulfilling orders for The Love More Shop. The floor is hard and my tail bone has never fully healed from childbirth. I am positive that starring at a computer screen in a dark room is bad for your eyes, but here I sit because my baby lays asleep on the bed and these days, he rolls around a lot in his sleep. I am perhaps an inept mother - by boy is a year old and I still need to nurse him back to sleep several times a night and can't seem to get him into his crib without him suspecting something fishy and waking up. So, here I am, just in case he tries any new acrobatic moves tonight, I will be here to catch him.

This is him at the lake this weekend. Be still be heart.

These are the good ol' days.

What's Going On

Oh hey. It's been a couple of weeks. I've been busy working on something special - a new brand - a new business - a new project. Something had been stirring in me for months and it finally became realized a few weeks ago.

Love More.

Many of you know that "love more" has been my mantra for the past few years and now I am turning it into something more than that. I need to be reminded to love more each and every day moment and I know that unless your name is the Dalai Lama, you probably need the same reminder. So, we are starting by printing shirts, tanks, and onesies with a simple Love More design on them. Shirts that will remind you to love more when you see your kids wearing them or help you avoid that negative remark when you know what words are plastered against your chest. It's cool and simple - but the real excitement comes from our Love Fund. A portion of the proceeds from every shirt will go into a Love Fund and each time the Love Fund reaches $100, we will pick a winning couple (or single parent) to go out and nurture their love for one another (or themselves) because a loving world starts with a loving home and a loving home starts with loving parents. Read more about it on our site and stay with us as we get everything rolling and spread the word!

Follow on instagram or check out the site that is still under construction.

Yoga Tanks

I have been thinking about making yoga tanks for a little while now but before I make the leap I want to get your opinion. Do you like these mock-ups?? Do you like the script or the block letters on the top two tanks? What do you think about tanks with the yamas and niyamas? Lay it on me because I want your help. 

xo

ps. stay tuned for what's next!

Dress and Play

I recently discovered Sonnet James, a dress shop for mamas. It's so great to find companies for mamas that still like to look cute and stylish! I love how playful this company and their clothes are! Hoping to add one of their Remi Dresses to my small "live in" summer dress collection. Check them out!

BREASTMILK

Has anyone seen Ricky Lakes new documentary about breastfeeding?? I just found out about it and can't wait to see it! I saw The Business of Being Born when I was in my early 20's and learning about child birth. I was hooked and had I not gone to design school I would have become a midwife. I am excited to see that she has made a new documentary - this time about breastmilk. 

I love, love, love breast feeding and at this point I dread the day I will begin weaning my boy. I am sure it will feel okay when the time is right.. Right...?

We are often told that breast milk is better. Better for babies, better for mothers, better for nutrition, health, well-being, and society. Many accept this and yet there are still very few women who succeed in breastfeeding exclusively for the recommended six months and beyond. What would it take to change?

Ps. They say human should breastfeed until age 7. I wish people would get there panties out of a bundle when they see someone breast feeding their 3 year old. Aren't there more important things to be concerned about?

Just mustaching around a few weeks ago.

I was recently interviewed by the ladies at The Best Gift Of Life and then featured on their website. Really honored that they asked me to be a part of this beautiful community of mothers.

My ego wants to fit back into my old clothes, to wear t-shirts that expose my belly, to look hot in a bikini. But my spirit loves this squishy mommy body. This body that grew, birthed, and feeds this sweet little boy. This body that made me a mother.

Yes. I love this body.

The most important person on earth is a mother. She can not claim the honor of having built Notre Dame Cathedral. She need not. She has built something more magnificent than any cathedral - a dwelling for an immortal soul, the tiny perfection of her baby's body.

"The angels have not been blessed with such a grace. They cannot share in God's creative miracle to bring new saints to Heaven. Only a human mother can. Mothers are closer to God the Creator than any other creatures. God joins forces with mothers in performing this act of creation... What on God's good earth is more glorious than this: to be a mother?"
-Joseph Cardinal Mindszenty

You hate your crib. You have slept with me since you were born - but I think it's time you slept in your crib for part of the night a few days a week. The dilemma? You hate your crib and I don't know if I believe in letting you cry it out. Sure, your cries are usually those of frustration and not fear. And sure I know you need to learn that you are safe in your crib alone and it's okay to rest. But you are still a baby, and babies want their mamas and maybe you will be more comfortable sleeping on your own when you are a little older? You need to learn to self soothe - but is it really that important for little babies to learn right away or does it just make life more convenient for parents? I don't know - and I don't know what the best plan is - but I do know it doesn't feel right in my heart to let you cry in your crib - whether you are tricking me or not.

There is always noise. The freeway, the bridge, the train station, the construction, the factories, the ships, the occasional outraged homeless person, the kids in the playground, the dishwasher that sounds like heavy machinery. What is it like for a baby growing up in a city? What's it like for you when we walk under the bridge? The environment in which you are growing up is very different than the one I grew up in. How will that affect the person you become? Will you love cities? Will you love noise? Will you crave quiet country air?

You are asleep in your stroller in the front hall. I hope you stay that way for a while because you are sick and haven't been sleeping well at night. I am eating a soggy sandwich.

You have four teeth now. Although they are tiny, I think that is another things you got from me - big front teeth. Did you get any of your dad's genes? You have started to stand on your own but your record is only two seconds. We play in your room a lot of the time these days but I know we are both looking forward to dry/warm weather so we can spend our days in the park.

I am starring at my soggy sandwich. I don't think I can finish it.

"Nursing does no diminish the beauty of a woman's breasts; it enhance their charm by making them look lived in and happy."
-Robert A. Heinlein

Why are people so uncomfortable seeings breasts? I am not a modest breast feeder. Mainly because I don't see the point of modesty when it comes to breast feeding and partly (a small part) because those breast feeding covers are a pain. I love nursing my babe and it seems suffocating to care what other people think about it. If it makes people uncomfortable it makes me question their mental health - and breaks my heart.

“Imagine that the world had created a new 'dream product' to feed and immunize everyone born on earth. Imagine also that it was available everywhere, required no storage or delivery, and helped mothers plan their families and reduce the risk of cancer. Then imagine that the world refused to use it.” 
-Frank A. Oski

This Boy

I am finding it incredibly difficult to blog. My baby thinks that naps are uncool and sleeping at night is becoming just as lame.

Not only that, but he enjoys being held for 18 of his 19 waking hours. No, the ergo and the sling are not acceptable; only mothers arms. Sometimes we can get away with a stroller ride around town...

Today he enjoyed an apple for about 7 minutes before deciding it was merely something to be slapped and thrown. After I finished 6 loads of laundry with baby in tow, he thought it was the right time to pee straight onto the crotch of my clean pants making it look like I, in fact, had peed my pants. He now has three teeth and his second (third?) cold. He likes playing in dirt, sucking on shower heads, mangos and strawberries, a nice looking dog, ladies, consuming Hemingway, Tolstoy and Proust, dancing to salsa, blues and reggae, and a good water bottle lid. But again... He would like everyone to know, he does not like sleeping.

Theodore Kingsley... You are something.

A Trip To The Animals

Yesterday we visited the zoo. It was a sunny 65 degrees in Portland, so baby and I thought we would visit the animals. Aside from a few concerts, I haven't been to the zoo for almost twenty years. They are sad places, aren't they?

Aside from the sadness we felt for the animals, it was a wonderful outing. Baby was relaxed on my chest and stayed awake long enough to see all the animals. It was just the two of us, winding our way between groups of children and strollers, peeking through fences, and standing in front of giant glass windows. Our favorite parts were the cheetahs pacing only a few inches away from us, the penguins eating their lunch, and the seal swimming around like some kind of creature from a storybook.

xo

Some More Baby

One more week with a 6 month old. He is already standing with one hands support. Shit's about to get crazy.

Oh.. and obviously he digs bath time.

A Boy And Some Sprouting Teeth

This good looking little person is sprouting a couple of teeth! I can feel them coming through and it's both exciting and scary. Scary because they grow up fast and scary because I fear the pain my nipples will soon be subjected to.

I guess this is why he wakes up yelling at me multiple times a night. Sorry, babe and welcome, teeth.

Chewbeads

To everyone that has a tiny human living with them - do you know about Chewbeads? I have the Hudson Necklace and two Jane Necklaces and I looove them. 

Babies love necklaces, do they not? So instead of them sucking and chewing on your jewelry that may or may not be coated in unwanted toxins - you can wear these teether beads to be sucked and chewed on instead! They are 100% silicone, have no BPA, pthalates, lead, cadmium, or metal, and dishwasher safe! They are squishy - like a bottle nipple. 

Our beads are used multiple times a day. I wear them when I am holding Theo, let him play with them in the stroller, he chews on them while in his high chair or rolling around on the floor, Isaac even uses them to help him go to sleep when it's his turn to put him to sleep. If you have a teething baby or a friend that's teething - get some. 

xo

What To Register For Your New Babe

When I thought about what I wanted to bring into our home for baby, I wanted to keep it very simple. But when you are expecting your first baby you don't usually know what to register for. What do you actually need? Now that my babe has been around for a few months I can tell you what has and hasn't been useful. What we have bought since he moved in with us and what we could have lived without.